Updates

My eyes have been twitching alot lately, doesn’t seem like a good thing..

Life.. is slowly showing signs of screw-ups

Also, as time passes, my future just gets darker and darker..

Don’t know where to go, what to do after graduation..

Want to learn things but just can’t find the time..

Caring for someone apathetic and getting hurt..

Been told that i’m not good at this, not good at that… (Wasn’t given a chance to prove my worth)

Sometimes I just feel that life really sucks, especially when you have absolutely no idea where your future lies.. and when the person you really trust, is out there to get you (seems like she has a grudge with you).

You know she like that, but you can’t help getting hurt.

Now, all I wanna do, is to not think and be apathetic. How?

What I wanna do?

I want to be in a room,

with no windows, only a door.

Where I can contact with nothing.

No living beings,

No sound,

No Light,

Can enter my boundaries.

Then, I want to be blindfolded. 

Lying on the soft floor (be it being covered by fur, wool, cotton, water or air)

With my arms spread as wide as I can.

To lay there. Still. Not a movement.

And not thinking

That is what I want to do.

 

I don’t even know who I am now. What is the real me?

I’m tired. Really tired.

Responsibility VS Money

Mummy, can I ask you a question?

Yes?

You said before that education is and will be the most important asset in our life.

Yup, that’s right. Do you want to be like the girl that goes “BoomZ!” ? 

Erm.. Of course not.

So, it is your responsibility to study hard while you can. Alrights?

Yes Mummy. But I am not asking you about this.

Then what do you want to ask? (getting a little annoyed)

You said that you are responsible to provide us with education, right?

uh huh… 

So, that means, you’ll do anything to give us that asset…

uh huh…

Which includes paying for our education?

Of course, so you think you’re capable of paying your school fees is it? Now out with it. What do you want?

Remember my diploma fees was paid using your CPF right?

YES? WHAT ABOUT IT?

They (CPF “runners”) are asking me to pay back my diploma fees. 

SO?

Do you want to pay in full or installments? 

Of course installments la. Once the money goes in, it will never come out until you are old (& senile, That’s why it is called retirement funds)

So what is your account number?

For?

Well you said you are responsible for my education, that’s why i need your account so that they can deduct (the installments through Giro) from there.

So you want me to pay your school fees?

erm.. isn’t that obvious?

write your bank account number down la

Huh? So, are you asking me to pay myself? My entire 3 years diploma fees BY MYSELF?

難道你還要跟我伸手要錢嗎？ (please don’t tell me you still want to get money from me)

(but you said…………………..)

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I’ve really got nothing to say man

To one of my most treasured person…

I don’t know if that was referring to me,

If you’ve decided to let go, I won’t stop you. Its your freedom.

But I just want to say, if you need me, I’ll try and be there. No promises, but I’ll try.

Friends? Or superficial long-term passerby?/ Camera depression

Sometimes, I feel that I’m too clingy

But then, I feel that I have to do it

Because, I feel that you are drifting further and further.

Not because you never interact.

But because you are the one pushing me away from you.

I guess, living alone is a much better choice.

So that you won’t get hurt.

Oh the other hand, I can’t seemed to take nice pictures anymore!

Really really sad… disappointed and depressed.

“Ahhh!! fuck off for once can you?”

I feel like saying that to her.

Paid for the books already, what do you want me to do??

You were the one who said “快去還書的錢” before chasing me off so that you can buy your clothes

You were the one who REFUSED to bring your handphone so no one in the world will be able to contact you.

You were the one who TOLD me that YOU WANT to go to the library with me, and ended up asking me to go myself so that you can shop around when the library closes earlier than any shops around. (If you didn’t made that shopping decision, I will definitely not pay those books)

You were the one who, AFTER SHOPPING, DECIDED to continue walking around aimlessly, and then after that, blame me for being not finding you when: 1) you don’t have a mobile; 2) you walked around despite me walking around to find that familiar figure.

Now?

You’re fucking blaming me for not using my brain? 

Blaming me for not coming down to talk to you? 

You are blaming me for not postponing the payment to a later date?

You are blaming me for not knowing the details?

 

LOOK WHO’S TALKING? Maybe its time for you to reflect what you have said. Because I am extremely disappointed and I cannot be bothered about your nonsense any longer.

 

FYI: If she’s not going to pay me or sharing the cost with me, I am just going to treat this time around as an investment loss.

R.I.P MJ, King of Pop

Passed away at the age of 50 on 25/6/09

Sad… Loved his Songs since young.. (I know that sounds like an indication that I’m getting old, but…)

On a lighter note, check out the conversation I had with my friend

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interesting huh?

fortune cookie quotes

“In the end there are three things that last: faith, hope and love; and the greatest of these is love.”

Michelle’s Post of “He’s just not into you”

Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, every story we’re told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we’re so focused on finding our happy ending we don’t learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don’t, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn’t include a guy, maybe… it’s you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is… just… moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.

小學的初戀？？

自從小學畢業自後，

九年。。 在一瞬間。。過了。。

好久，好久沒有見到小學同學了。

他們，一個一個都變了。。

男生都變高了，女生變都變漂亮了。。

都瘦了。。甚至有的變胖了 （hint：me）

 

有一個，卻變得。。

好壯 。。肩膀也變寬了。。臉，也變尖了。

可是，他的笑容。。依然保持不變。。

好迷人啊！

我想對你說，

謝謝你，在那時候，對我說 ”我喜歡你“

在我身邊給我希望，鼓勵和支持。。

我希望，這一刻，永遠。。都不會變。。。

 

真的，

謝謝你 （：

我的小學同學。

Interesting quote in FB

Love is as strong as death, as hard as hell. Death separates the soul from the body, but Love separates all things from the soul.

 

(: awww…